Life with CKD: Diet (part 1)

I don’t like eating.

As odd as it sounds, I find it annoying that the body has to eat to sustain itself.  I love the social aspect of going out with friends to a meal, but beyond the first two bites, I don’t usually enjoy my food.

Ever since I started dialysis, I’ve never had much appetite.  This is common among patients with kidney failure.  Occasionally I also experience the nausea that comes with being too hungry, and my day is filled with moments of wondering I’m starving but I don’t want to eat.  What can I eat that’s filling enough to keep me happy until my next feeding?

Ironically my scale tells me I’m the heaviest I’ve ever been.  When I shared my weight with a friend, she reacted, “Really? You must have heavy bones.”  I guess I don’t look as heavy as I am.

The weight comes from the extra fluid my body is carrying because my kidneys aren’t able to flush out the excess, and because peritoneal dialysis (PD) fills me with extra calories.  Apparently PD fluid is a dextrose solution;  it’s sugar water!  I’m basically consuming a candy bar every time I connect myself to dialysis – except I don’t get to enjoy that candy bar.  If only dialysis came in the form of a KitKat bar.

So that’s my relationship with food right now.  I suspect all this goes away once I have a healthy kidney in my body.  Then I’m back to “normal,” at least a new normal with a new set of whacky side effects.  But that’s another blog post.

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Next blog post: What I can and cannot eat.